BFBU: Best Friend Break-ups

I sat in the passenger seat of the car holding the brown-paper bag. I did not dare look at its contents until I was safely off the tennis court and in the car. Now I looked into the bag. My vision began to blur and my eyes swim. Under some of my forgotten night clothes laid my homecoming mum. All these items had been left at my best friend Katie's house.

"Are you ok, Kara" my mom asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine."

Once safely inside, I ran to my room and threw myself on my bed. The sobs would not hold themselves inside any longer. I could not hold myself together anymore. I buried my face in the pillows and let out all the sadness, anger, feelings of injustice, betrayal, and hurt. How could Katie stop being my friend? We were inseparable. We played tennis together, had the same private instructor, had sleepovers almost every weekend--we did everything together. As a shy individual, I really only needed Katie. I loved having one best friend and some acquaintances.

The break-up began to show its cracks when Katie's boyfriend of four months wanted more and more of her time. It started in about January of our freshman year. The distancing, ignoring, and irritation at my growing distaste for the boyfriend she "loved." She would ignore me at assemblies and sit with Josh. She hung out with him on the weekends. She walked with him in the hallways. Every second he was there. I felt suffocated. Sometimes I just wanted to scream and say "I want to hangout with my best friend without you there!"

I began to voice my distasteful opinions about him. Bad idea. Katie told Josh everything I thought about him. Wasn't I supposed to be able to trust my best friend?

By May, the break was complete. That's why after my private tennis lesson and at the beginning of hers, Katie gave me back my stuff. She did not want to see me again. My heart broke.

Our freshman class was being split in half because the high school was having half of the inhabitants be redistricted to the new high school. This meant Josh was leaving. The small hope I had of Katie and I becoming friends again vanished when I found out she received permission to transfer to the new high school. She transferred to be with Josh. She left me completely to be with him. She convinced the district that it would be bad for her "emotional and psychological health" to be separated from him. Pathetic. That's what I thought it was, pathetic.

My fear of abandonment and losing people I cared about resurfaced. After losing people when I turned eleven I struggled with that. Losing Katie made me realize "you can't put all your eggs in one basket," as my mom says. I learned to try to put aside my shyness and make many friends.

Since then, Katie and I have reconciled. We rarely talk since high school, but are still on good terms. Her and Josh broke up two months into going to the same school. We both learned a lot through those experiences. No matter how painful, she taught me a valuable lesson.